I made this half-pony, half-monkey monster to please you

I first came across Jonathan Coulton's "Skullcrusher Mountain" on Fluxblog a few weeks back, and it has grown on me like a bad habit. Fluxblog wrote, "If you have a high tolerance for smirky humor and mainstream country pop, this will probably seem like some kind of gift from above. Coulton nails the contemporary glossy American singer-songwriter aesthetic while subverting the genre with bizarro lyrics written from the perspective of a reclusive mad scientist/supervillain in love with his dim-witted but beautiful hostage."

Well, it just so happens, I am all of the above. (It also turns out that Jonathan Coulton is the musical director for the Little Gray Book Lecture Series, another one of the things I miss about New York.) You can link to the full lyrics above, but this has got to be my favorite verse ever:

I made this half-pony, half-monkey monster to please you
But I get the feeling that you don't like it
What's with all the screaming?
You like monkeys
You like ponies
Maybe you don't like monsters so much
Maybe I used too many monkeys
Isn't it enough to know that I ruined a pony
Making a gift for you?

Prepare to be taken hostage.