korean scientists only charge $53,000 to clone a dog

WFMU's Beware of the Blog pitches the true story of Joyce McKinney as a Coen Brothers film.

A young cheerleader from North Carolina moves to Wyoming where she wins the state beauty pageant. Then she enrolls in graduate school at Brigham Young University where she becomes obsessed with Wayne Osmond (the second oldest Osmond). Wayne rejects her, but happiness is around the corner because she meets and falls in love with a 19-year-old Mormon classmate. They have a lot of sex. Alas, the Mormon is shamed by their sex-before-marriage and runs away to do missionary work. He leaves no forwarding address.

Our heroine then hires a pair of kooky private detectives who track the Mormon to London. She heads to the U.K., and with the help of a dim-witted accomplice, drugs the Mormon with Chloroform, kidnaps him, and scurries him away to a secluded farmhouse. There she ties the Mormon to a bed with furry handcuffs, and uses scriptures to beg him to marry her. When that doesn't work, she tries lots of sex. But the Mormon escapes, and when the police track down our heroine, she declares innocence, claiming that the Mormon could only orgasm while tied up. She sounds completely nutty in court - "I loved him so much that I would have skied down Mount Everest in the nude with a carnation up my nose if he asked me to." - but has a Southern Belle style that makes the media go crazy for her.

...and there's more.-